But for some, it just isn’t possible.
They can achieve an erection and derive pleasure from intercourse.
Yet, despite how much they may want to, they aren’t able to reach an orgasm.
'Delayed ejaculation' affects nearly eight per cent of men, according to sexual health expert Dr Tobias Köhler, of SIU HealthCare in Illinois.
Men suffering delayed ejaculation can end up having sex for 20 minutes or longer without finishing – often giving up only when they feel exhausted or embarrassed.
Even though it’s fairly common, though, few men even know this disorder exists, Dr Köhler told Daily Mail Online.
Men's sexual health expert Dr Tobias Köhler, of SIU HealthCare in Illinois, revealed to Daily Mail Online the delayed ejaculation - which occurs when a man can get an erection but cannot achieve an orgasm - affects nearly eight per cent of men
WHAT IS DELAYED EJACULATION?
Most of the emphasis in the arena of men’s sexual health is placed on erectile dysfunction.
That condition entails an inability to achieve an erection long enough to complete sex.
In fact, as many as 52 per cent of men are affected by erectile dysfunction, according to the Cleveland Clinic.
As a result, people are much more comfortable talking about erectile dysfunction – and seeking medical attention for it – than they are with delayed ejaculation.
Dr Köhler told Daily Mail Online: ‘If you’re having problems getting to that point consistently or if it’s taking you longer than you think it should, then you should be concerned and see somebody about it.’
Delayed ejaculation doesn’t actually refer to a problem just with ejaculating.
Instead, it refers to a problem reaching orgasm in general, he said.
Men with the disorder can have sex and enjoy it, even without reaching completion – just as a woman who can’t orgasm would.
But despite enjoying sex, not being able to orgasm often causes mental distress for men with the disorder.
It can also cause distress for their partners, who may grow frustrated by the man's inability to orgasm during sex.
Dr Köhler said: ‘Most of these guys that truly have [delayed ejaculation], their success rate is one in five – they’ll try to have sex five times and only be able to finish once.’
WHAT CAUSES DELAYED EJACULATION?
Delayed ejaculation can occur when a man who normally takes only three or four minutes to reach orgasm – starts taking more than 15 minutes, according Dr Köhler.
On the other hand, delayed ejaculation can also be a permanent condition that has affected a man since he began having sex.
Scientists aren’t quite sure why this occurs yet, though they believe mental issues, illnesses or drug interaction can cause the disorder.
The doctor said: ‘The most common cause of acquired delayed ejaculation is the use of antidepressants.’
Certain antidepressants produce excess levels of serotonin on the brain, which is ‘bad’ for ejaculation.
Dr Köhler added: ‘The way the system is set up, that level is supposed to be low and not high.’
HOW IS DELAYED EJACULATION TREATED?
The first thing a doctor will do is try to pinpoint the underlying reasons for a person’s delayed ejaculation.
They’ll ask about medications – such as antidepressants.
And if medication is the case, the doctor will adjust the dosage a man is taking.
The doctor will also test for thyroid conditions, diabetes, multiple sclerosis and more – just to rule out anything severe.
But for most men, an identifiable cause for their disorder won’t be found.
Instead, delayed ejaculation may occur because of psychological conditions, such as depression.
Furthermore, some men may have problems achieving orgasm if they are consumed by a fear of pregnancy, fear of intimacy or other anxieties.
In those cases, a doctor will recommend the patient seek help from a sexual psychologist and counselor.
Furthermore, delayed ejaculation can also occur in men who masturbate frequently – and can’t replicate the same sensation with partner sex.
Dr Köhler said: ‘Some of the guys can’t orgasm because their partner can’t produce the same pressure rhythm.
‘A lot of times you have to do retraining of these guys to either discontinue masturbating as much or so that they don’t do it in a way that is unusual or unlike what they would experience with their partner.’
WOMEN CAN SUFFER DELAYED ORGASMS TOO
At the end of the day, even though men and women are wired differently, an inability to orgasm is very similar among the two sexes.
Dr Köhler said: ‘The only difference between men and women is that it’s a lot more obvious when a guy orgasms than when a girl does.
‘The way the culture is set up is that it’s more of an expectation that a guy wouldn’t have this problem, but maybe a woman would.’
And so, he said, nobody really talks about delayed ejaculation – even though women's orgasm issues are commonly discussed in popular culture and women's health publications.
He added: ‘You don’t hear about [delayed ejaculation] on sitcoms, as opposed to with women, which you hear all the time.'
Expert outlines causes of delayed ejaculation and cures
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